50th Suprise !!!

So you decided to throw me a surprise party. Was I surprised? You bet! I was surprised by the fact my good friends and family found me worthy enough to go through all the pain of planning and pulling off the event. But I am more than surprised.

I am grateful.

Grateful for the fact that you all decided to take time out of your lives to help celebrate the fact that I have managed to stay alive for 50 years.

I am amazed.

Amazed that God would choose one man and bless him with such loyal and caring friends. The type of friends that will look past your short falls and lift you up on every opportunity. Amazed God blessed this man with the perfect parents to love and care for him, the best brother and sister a man could imagine. Blessed with great in-laws who would always be there for him. The best grand parents, uncles, aunts, nieces and nephews, cousins, god-daughter and god-son whom he could share his life with.

I am in awe.

Awe that God would bless this man with the most beautiful and loving wife, bless him with the perfect son and daughter to give him purpose and be the well from where his pride springs. Blessed with the perfect son and daughter in-law to love and complete his children. And to be truly blessed with two grandsons to steal his heart and throw out his back..

I am humbled by the fact that I get to be "that man."

So you may have come to celebrate with me because you think I have touched your life in some small way but let me assure you it is I who had the honor to celebrate with you as I know you all have touched mine.

So from a grateful and humble heart..... Thank you!!!

peace and thank for listening......

Thanks Giving Stickers

Out of all the holidays, Thanksgiving is by far my favorite. If you read my blog you know the reason...that's right it's all about celebrating with family and loved ones. It is the one time of year where I forget all the woes of life and hard feelings are put aside and I share my home. I love to sit in my big chair watching football and play bingo. I love how the house has that aroma of turkey and spices. I love to sit back and hear the buzz of all the conversations and laughter from the kids. But as I sat there I couldn't help but feel this year it seemed a little off, something was just not right. As I sat down to write about Thanksgiving, I racked my brain for two weeks trying to come up something witty about being thankful for all that God has done and given us in our lives. How we should never take family for granted because you never know when they will leave us. How we could show God's love by reaching out to perfect strangers with a charitable gift, but again something was missing. There was no real joy... you know the kind. I thought but why? Was it because of the economy? Was it because of the recent stress at work. How about old age, relationships lost? Where was my joy in all of this?


You know over the past two years I have slowed down and started listening to the "Holy nudges" God sends and have been really deliberate in being open for a lesson at any time. That lesson came yesterday and I saw it coming and couldn't stop it.


As pastor Tim and I had lunch at the local In n Out, we were sharing some small talk about our jobs, small group and life in general when all of a sudden "JOY" hit me right between the eyes.



The little boy sitting behind us was so pumped up about getting stickers with his meal he could hardly sit still. But the most gracious part was when he wanted to share his stickers with others. He walked up to our table and asked us if we wanted one. You should have seen the joy in his eyes as Tim said "sure put one right there" and pointed to the back of his hand. Then he turned to me and before I could answer he gave me mine and said "these are for you."


After giving us our stickers he went to another table and did the same not caring about rejection or what others thought. He had to share. His mom quickly gathered him up to go out the door and as he was about to leave he ran back over and gave Tim a big hug. Another humbling lesson learned.


See we have all been give a gift in life ....it is salvation through Jesus..and real joy comes from sharing that gift no matter what others might think. I chose to let my troubles steal my real joy and take my eye off of Him. When we do what he commands he gives us a life full of joy..even in our troubles and trials.. He says in John 15:11 I told you this so my joy may be in you and your joy may be complete.

So if you are reading this and have no joy, ask yourself.....when was the last time I shared Christ with another no matter what? And if you don't know Christ ..get to.... do so and you will find joy again..

I placed the stickers the little boy gave me on my bible to remind me of this fact..


1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18
16be joyful always; 17 pray continually; 18 give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

Peace and thanks for listening..... and JOY

Because your country called....

Much has been written about the sacrifice of our service men for the simple freedoms we enjoy in this country. However little is written or talked about the effect this has on that serviceman's family and loved ones. My dad ( bottom left) loved God 1st and then his family, but a close 3rd was the love he had for the Air Force and serving his country. He was a Vet and as his hat said " damn proud of it". I am not going to be cliche and write about respecting our freedoms but give you a brief look at life through the eyes of a Veterans child.






Because your country called........... you were forced up in the middle of the night to say good-bye to your family, not to see them for months on end..

Because your country called......... I fell asleep to a mother's soft cries from the room next door...

Because your country called........ I learned to catch a ball by throwing it on the roof and waiting for it to roll down....

Because your country called...... No one was there to catch me when I fell off my bike, or I had trouble with the bullies at school

Because your country called..... I saw the despair in a mother's face as the car broke down and wondered who would help....

Because your country called..... A man was not there to give " the talk" to your daughter's first school dance date......

Because your country called........ A wife slept alone, a child looked for guidance, birthdays, Christmas and other holidays were not complete...

When I became a man I asked you, " What country would ask a man and his family to give up so much?" " What commander and chief would ask so much from those who serve?" You told me " The USA is where I live but my country is the Kingdom of God and my commander and chief is Jesus Christ and I do all things to glorify him."
That is why I served.....when my country called !!

Happy Veterans Day pops!!! I miss you and love you very much......


1 Peter 4:11
If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.

peace and thanks for listening....

A letter to Boston...

Hey little guy,

it's about a month away and you will be here. You don't know me yet but I am Papa Jepp, I am your daddy's daddy. I haven't seen you or held you yet but I know I love you. I can't wait to teach you how to throw a ball and open doors and play hide and seek. I will teach you what I know about God and life and pass to you the values of your dad and great grandfather whom your middle name comes from. I can't wait to see you ride a bike, play sports, fish and fall in love. You also have a Granma Nana and she is going to love you and love you.

You have a great cousin named Broc. His mommy Domonique, is your daddy's sister. I love him just as much as you..no more no less and you two both have my heart. I can't wait until I can take you both camping or to an Angels game..no not the ones they play in heaven..it's baseball..I'll explain later. I just can't wait til you get here.

You have the best dad in the world, he is the most loving man I know and he puts God first. You have the best mom in the world. You wanna know why? Cause God picked her out of all the women in the world to carry you and to care for you and God's plan is always perfect. She is a blessed woman as you are a blessing. Now sometime they are going to seem like they are mad at you and make you cry, but they love you and you can always call Papa Jepp and I'll make it better. God must have found you extra special to bless you with your mommy and daddy.

So swim around in mommies tummy a while longer and Papa Jepp and Nana will wait for you to get here along with your Papa Mark and Granma Deb and all your Uncles and two Aunties and Broc.

But remember most of all Papa Jepp loves you with all his heart.

Psalm 100

5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

peace and thanks for listening......

The Rage Within

In my small group we recently came across a study on the qualities a deacon of the church should possess. There were 20 in all and pastor Tim challenged us to look at ourselves and come back with 3 we felt we needed to work on. Later he sparked a fire in me from a simple challenge he made where he threaten to send this list to our wives and let them decide what we needed. I thought what a great way to see how the world see me. So I took the list and gave it to a few people , some family and some not and there was a common thread amongst them. Little did I know of the journey this would take me on. I have an issue with controlling my temper and am very sarcastic. I know from my education that anger is a secondary emotion for mostly hurt fear and disappointments. So I am writing this prayer to see where this rage from within comes from in order to surrender it to God.

Where oh where does it's strong roots lie oh Lord? In the whispers and cries heard by a small boy of how a man might approach him at school and tell him he is his real father? Or how that man never really wanted him in the first place? Lord does the rage come from the sick acts of a man in a mall bathroom when the boy was just but 8 or 9 or from the betrayal of the only person he shared this with causing two Boy Scouts to taut him and reenact the same a few months later? Does the bitterness come from the doubt of coaches in his abilities, only to have them all say they were wrong later? Show me Lord and take the Rage from within...

Does the rage come from not living up to others expectations? Or from the constant bad decisions and the pain they caused? Does it come from the misinterpreted criticism from a father whom did not think the boy wasn't good enough but rather didn't want him to settle? Does it come from the company which he emerged his loyalty in only to be tossed aside for money sake? Does the rage come from a father who was taken too soon do to a doctors oversight? Search my heart Lord..

Why does the man daydream about someone doing him wrong and then killing this person? Could the man actually kill? Where does this hate and rage come from? Are your blessings not enough for me? Am I that hardened that I can not show grace after receiving grace? Take from me this rage this day Lord that I might be able to serve you.. let this be my prayer.. Amen ...

This prayer was written a few months back at the beginning of my journey. By just being still and listening to what God was trying to tell me I have been given a perfect understanding of where the rage lies. See I have lived a life that some or maybe all of us live at some time, feeling we at not enough. Not smart enough, not fast enough, not tall enough, or just not enough. Trying to live for others expectations is a no win situation. I wrote earlier on the hard way but now I realize that it was the hard way because it was the easy way. I took the short cuts in life like got the job before school and now pay the price. I quit trying at baseball because someone told me they didn't think I could make it. I have let people set my value all my life. This is where the rage dwells.. in the bitterness of feeling not enough I have been holding...but wait there is a happy ending.

You see God's plan is perfect..as we were to watch a video of Andy Stanley in my small group, the leader could not find it so had to settle for another speaker,which none of the group was interested in, however the Holy Spirit said Jeff today will be the day you understand. As the speaker went on he was writing things on a mirror of how we struggle with feelings... fear, disappointment he wrote and went on and on ( like this post).. then he wrote " Not Enough" he said have you ever felt not enough in your life? Those words ripped into my soul and exposed me for all to see and I wanted to scream " Yes Yes..that me!!" The speaker said you have always been just enough.. you know when you became just enough?? I thought tell me tell me!!! He said you became just enough the moment Christ died for you on that cross...........

A wounded heart placed in the hands of love..... never again will I let another define my worth.....Christ has made me " just enough"... and the rage that was a fire I am still working on it and still struggle daily.. but I know my value.....

Psalm 139: 23-24 23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

peace and thanks for listening............

For My Daughter...

I always write about my family and this time I would like to focus on my daughter. My daughter has the biggest heart in the world and the most infectious laugh. We are both alike as some people mistake our kindness for weakness and take advantage of us. However she will not allow this hurt to define who she is. She will smile and deal with the pain and always forgive just as God forgives us. This is where her strength lies...it is in her compassion, tolerance and willingness to forgive.

So Nikki the one thing I know is that when things get a little tough in life is when you have to pray and keep swinging the hardest. Never ever give up on your goals in life...

Here are a few verses from Proverbs 31: on a wife of noble character....

10 [c] A wife of noble character who can find?

She is worth far more than rubies.

11 Her husband has full confidence in her

and lacks nothing of value.

12 She brings him good, not harm,

all the days of her life.

15 She gets up while it is still dark;

she provides food for her family

and portions for her servant girls.

16 She considers a field and buys it;

out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

17 She sets about her work vigorously;

her arms are strong for her tasks.

18 She sees that her trading is profitable,

and her lamp does not go out at night.

20 She opens her arms to the poor

and extends her hands to the needy.

21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;

for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;

she can laugh at the days to come.

26 She speaks with wisdom,

and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

27 She watches over the affairs of her household

and does not eat the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise and call her blessed;

her husband also, and he praises her:

29 "Many women do noble things,

but you surpass them all."

30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;

but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

31 Give her the reward she has earned,

and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

MY baby....keep your eyes on the Lord and keep swinging....

peace and thanks for listening......

Becoming the Papa

This is me and my grandson... pops/papalito. Someone asked me where I got the word pops from and why do you call him papalito.. for me it is little Papa. In my family he will become a "Papa" but what does that mean??.. Other than this little guy let me share this with you..

In our family the word "Papa" is the highest honor a man can hold. It means he is the head of his household and extended family. He is both a moral and spiritual leader. He must show great patients and compassion but not be hesitant to use the rod of obedience. Let me share with you three great men in my life that are Papa's..

First there was the original, Henry aka. Bud. He was a dark skinned dark haired handsome man. ( Not just cause we look alike) He was quiet and gentle in the way he talked to everyone and treated everyone equal. He was also a very hard worker. I remember him coming home from working at the mines all day just to pack up the truck and go up the mountain to a lady's cabin to weld some pipes that broke. He taught me work ethic and to have a gentle manner. Papa Bud taught me to work hard but also to take time for your family and play hard as well. He passed when I was 12.

Second was my father Johnny B. There is not enough space on the Internet for me to write what I have learned from this man. First off you have to understand that early on he was gone allot ( therefore the influence of Papa Bud) but it was not his fault as he was in the Air Force and we were at war in the late 60's early 70's. He taught me that sometimes a man has to deny himself and make sacrifices for the good of his family. But God in his wisdom, planted us in paradise aka Victorville, and he got to stay home more right at the time I need him most. Never misjudge the wisdom of the Lord. Johnny taught me love of God and servitude. Serving not only God but your fellow man. He also instilled into me love of family and my passion for sports. It is also where I get my humor. I miss our talks that only a son and father can share and comprehend. He was my rock and always told me to "test it with the word for truth ". I love and miss him.. He passed when I was 44.

The last man in my life is my son Marcos. He is truly a man of God. I see a man with all the qualities,that I failed to live up to, passed through me to him from these other great men. I stand in awe of him and he make me strive to be a better man. He is just now going to be a father.. and I know he will be a great one, but one day he will truly hold the title of Papa and I can pass with no regrets...

So now I get to be the Papa and share myself ( what the others have taught me ) with the new line of Papa's and thank God for the days I have left and the eternity I have been given by his grace.

Proverbs 27:17 As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.

Peace and thanks for listening.....